Anger iceberg worksheet: a free printable for adults

I’m not a clinician, so this page sticks to what the sources say, including where they run out.

Where does the anger iceberg come from?

The best-documented version of the anger iceberg is the Gottman Institute’s, which published a blog post and a one-page handout in November 2016. The current version of that post credits its picture with the line “Image Inspired by the Creative Play Therapist”, and the credit links to an anger iceberg by Lauren Stockly, a licensed clinical social worker.

In a post dated the same day as Gottman’s, Stockly wrote: “The Gottman Institute contacted me about creating a version of my anger iceberg with graphics better-suited to older clients”. That is her own account. The research for this page found no statement from Gottman about it beyond the credit line and a link to her page at the end of the post.

Who first drew anger as an iceberg isn’t established, so I don’t call anyone its creator.

Is the anger iceberg backed by research?

The anger iceberg is a teaching metaphor, not a tested model. Searches of PubMed and Europe PMC for this page in October 2026 turned up no study that tests the iceberg itself, as a model or as a worksheet. That isn’t proof that none exists.

The support that does exist is indirect:

• The SAMHSA anger management manual, a programme published by a US government agency for adults with substance use and mental health conditions, teaches that feelings such as being afraid, disrespected, guilty or rejected can underlie anger. It asks its groups to view anger as secondary to those feelings, and the passage cites no study.
• A 1992 paper reported two studies of undergraduates in which shame-proneness (a tendency to feel shame) was “consistently correlated with anger arousal”. That’s a correlation in students. It doesn’t test whether anger covers shame.
• In the first study of a 2012 daily diary paper, people who were better at telling their emotions apart reported fewer aggressive tendencies when angry. The skill was measured, not taught, and this is a correlation too.

None of these used an iceberg, and only the abstracts of the journal papers on this page were read.

Anger can also be just anger. Gottman’s current page calls anger “completely valid as its own emotion”, and it no longer uses the phrase “secondary emotion” that its 2016 post did. A 2020 NHS trust workbook that includes an anger iceberg says anger can sometimes be just anger. A 2004 research review argues that research on physical pain and social stress suggests unpleasant conditions are “a major spur to anger”. So a blank space under the waterline is a fair answer.

How to fill in the anger iceberg worksheet

Use one sheet for one specific time you got angry.

1. Under “What happened?”, describe the event in a sentence or two: where you were, who was there, what was said or done.
2. Under “Above the surface”, write what other people could see or hear: what you said, what you did, how you sounded.
3. Under “Under the surface”, circle any of the 16 feeling words that fit. If none do, tick “Nothing else. I was angry, and that was all.” Use the lines for anything the list misses, including physical states such as being tired, hungry or in pain. NHS Scotland’s NHS inform guide says people are “more sensitive to triggers” when they’re stressed, tired or dealing with other problems.
4. Under “What did I need in that moment?”, write what would have helped right then, such as ten quiet minutes or being listened to.
5. Under “Is there anything I want to say or do about it now?”, write something only if there is something. “Nothing” is an answer.

A filled-in example

This example is made up. It isn’t my story or any real person’s.

Field	Example answer
What happened?	Got home an hour late. Partner asked whether the car was booked in for its service. It wasn’t.
Above the surface	Said “I can’t do everything”, too loudly. Shut the kitchen door hard.
Under the surface	Circled Embarrassed, Overwhelmed and Exhausted. Wrote: hungry, skipped lunch.
What did I need in that moment?	Ten minutes to sit down before any questions.
Is there anything I want to say or do about it now?	Say sorry for the door. Book the car tomorrow.

The example doesn’t conclude that embarrassment caused the anger. A worksheet can’t show that.

What to do with what you notice

One filled-in anger iceberg describes one moment, as you remember it afterwards. If the same feelings keep turning up under the surface, that’s worth knowing, and it takes more than one sheet to see it. A 2020 NHS trust workbook on anger suggests keeping a diary “for a few weeks” to “see whether there are any patterns”. The daily anger log on the tools page is the worksheet for that, and it asks what else was going on each day. So does Kettle, the daily anger journal I built for iPhone, which isn’t on the App Store yet.

I can’t promise any of this will change how angry you get. A 2018 review of meta-analyses found that anger treatments have “consistently demonstrated at least moderate effectiveness”. That evidence is about treatment programmes, not worksheets used alone. The SAMHSA manual says that, anecdotal reports aside, “there has been no research into the validity” of using it for self-study.

If anger is hurting you or the people around you, it’s worth taking your filled-in sheets to a professional. The Get help page lists where to start. For more on what can sit behind anger, read Why am I so angry? To put a number on how strong it gets, there’s the anger thermometer.

Who this worksheet is for

This anger iceberg worksheet is written for adults. Lauren Stockly, a play therapist, publishes her handout as part of her “Mindful Monsters Therapeutic Workbook”, and by her account the Gottman Institute’s version was made for “older clients”.

The worksheet is a reflection exercise. It isn’t an assessment, and it can’t tell you whether your anger is a problem. Only a professional can assess that.

Printing and sharing this worksheet

This worksheet is free to print and share, for yourself or for someone else.

That covers this page’s worksheet only. For other versions of the anger iceberg, check with whoever made them.